Swearing at a beaded wristlet is a bit like telling grandma to “take a flying f*ck.” One doesn’t drop “ef bombs” on grandma. And one doesn’t hurt the tender feelings of ruffled garments; it just isn’t done.

So when I broke the mohair twice after threading 54 beads and casting on 108 stitches, and then twist my stitches into a mobius round, I merely sighed. And felt my blood pressure spike.

Finally there was progress. Take a peek:

Knit from Knitty.com’s pattern Mrs. Beeton by Brenda Dayne of the podcast Cast-on.

Materials: Queensland Collection Soft Comfort Mohair in color 618 and black worsted from stash; size 8/0 Czech seed beads, silver lined crystal and size 6/0 Czech seed beads, crystal.

In spite of Mrs. Beeton’s peevishness, I adore her. (And plan to make many more.) To help you avoid some of her more annoying quirks, though, I offer the following tips:

Use bigger beads. The mohair I chose was particularly hairy, and consequently the proscribed seed beads refused to slide obediently down the yarn. The larger beads worked just fine.

Buy a Big Eye Needle. You will go blind trying to thread mohair through a craft needle small enough to accommodate a bead, so do yourself this favor and buy the beading needle.

All in all, Mrs. Beeton is a delight. I can’t wait to knit her a friend.